Saturday, August 04, 2012

The Olympics and similar spectator sports

I'm happy on behalf of those who manage to jump high, run fast, get small, large, or oval balls into various nets and so on. I used to enjoy doing that sort of thing as a kid myself, and it's healthy and fun for us old folks too, and we should be doing more of it. But, sorry to say, I usually don't find it sufficiently entertaining to look at, especially when you don't know the dickens who those people are in the first place. So I don't watch sports on TV or listen to it on the radio or read about it in the news. I'm not opposed to it; I simply don't share the interest.

What the Olympics are concerned, they're such a bore without the presence of Zeus, who was the very life of the party, the jubilant. And what about the other Olympian gods, like Aphrodite, Poseidon, Ares, Hades, Hephaestus, Athena, Artemis, Apollo, Demeter, Hera and Hermes? Not a single one of them is honored to the best of my knowledge. That's blasphemous to say the least. Instead, they do their things in honor of idols like McDonald's and Coca-Cola and Microsoft and ExxonMobil. Those are monsters of the underworld, and the wrath of the gods is bound to come down on this infamous sacrilege. I don't give a rat's behind about them athletes doping themselves, their penalties and disqualifications for doing so and all that jazz. That's why sponsorship of the arts is so much better, because artists can get stoned on any substances of their choosing.

Right now there's a puppy in my home playing with a ball, making eardrum-busting noise every time her ball rolls under some furniture so she can't get at it. It's a pain in the neck if you ask me, but it's still a lot better than all that cultural pollution on radio and TV with football, tennis, basket ball, baseball, water polo, golf and what have you with drunks and neo-Nazi flag-waving hooligans. I've never understood those flags. It's supposed to mean that if some ball ends up in some particular net a certain number of times, I'm supposed to be happy or proud or something like that or maybe sad or disappointed; it's supposed to do something to my emotions and state of mind. It's never done anything for me; maybe I need to talk to a shrink about it because it makes me not normal. Or perhaps all I need to do is to have a long talk with Apollo.